Since my last post, I feel a million times better. I wrote my last post the night I started my anti-depressant medications and they hadn't quite fully kicked in yet. But these days, I feel like myself again. Happy. Content. Grateful.
There hasn't been any new symptoms but I'm tired as heck. I am exhausted by 9pm (this from a girl who normally goes to bed at midnight or 1am) but instead of sleeping, like I should, I force myself to stay up because "my time" is much too sacred to me.
Also, the gravity of having four children has recently hit me. My days are busy and they're going to become much, much busier. I have a tendency to romanticize life and the thought of having four sounds absolutely wonderful but since this little bean miraculously decided to join us, I've really been thinking about how insane it's going to get. We've got a few months and maybe by then, Aiden will start pitching in more?! HA HA! Right :) But one thing that will lessen the load a bit is Aiden will start Kindergarten six months after the baby is born. Thus, by the time I finally figure out the whole "Mommy of Four" thing, life will get a little bit easier. Thank goodness.
I expect life to turn completely upside down and to be honest, a bit of hell (aka four kids screaming at me at once - yikes!!) some days but I'm still deliriously happy and I finally feel such a completion in our family. It's pretty amazing.
As far as weight, I'm started actually eating again, so "yay" there. I put back on the two pounds and am now sitting at 140. I'm trying to stay healthy. The recommended weight gain in the first trimester is 4 pounds, which means I should at least try to stay away from ice cream more often. Notice I didn't say "stay away," but rather, "try" because at this point, this preggo can't make any promises.
I have a pretty strong feeling that this is a boy but I, also, don't have the best history with the whole "mother's intuition" in regards to pregnancy and gender. So we'll see! I think that's all for now! :)
Love,
K
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