After Ali's birth, we fought a LOT about having a fourth. If you've been following this blog from the beginning, I'm sure you know all about it and if you're just starting out, then our
|Aiden, Tristen, Ali and me <3|
But the yearning for another baby in the future and the desire to fill my uterus with an itty-bitty baby started creeping in, to which I promptly slapped away. No, I'm done! I would tell myself.
But the desire was still there.
I think as we started creeping closer and closer to the vasectomy date something inside, I believe it's called my uterus, started panicking and and this maternal urge became stronger than seven tequila shots on a Kate Moss body.
I started half-jokingly, but will all seriousness, asking the hubby if we could have another. He would look at me in disbelief and say, "are you serious?!"
There have been a number of talks that I've shared on here as well as conversations I've kept private about our decision for another. About three weeks ago, I finally told Jarod that I was done and that we were done have kids. I still had the yearning for another but I rationalized that those feelings would always be there because it's always been my dream to be a mother and some things you just need to rationally push aside. The biggest reason I pushed these feelings away was because I had a husband who seemed utterly done with having more children.
Then, the other day as Jarod asked me how old Ali was, to which I replied she was turning 9 months this month, I got a bit teary-eyed at the idea of my baby turning one so very soon. I stared out the window thinking about how fast time goes by and how babies grow up even faster. Jarod took one look at me, pitied my little, sad soul and said, "I'm going to do something really crazy."
"You already know," he replied with smile, "we can have another baby."
"Really?!" was the first thing I said and the second was, "you're not going to change your mind again, are you??"
And after he reassured me he wouldn't, I let the excitement and happiness creep back in. I know there are many people, especially in this day and age, that think we're absolute insane for actually wanting a fourth child. To which I say, I think you're insane for not. Sure, they're a handful
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